I want to write, I need to write, I have so many thoughts and questions going round my head that I need to get out!
I feel really out of sorts, but can’t put my finger on why? I saw my CPN yesterday and we talked about how I was feeling and from things I said she said that isn’t depression it’s your emotions that you are struggling with. Which I’m now thinking about all the time. I was confused enough before I saw her, now I’m even more confused. Do some people have long term depression and learn to live with it? Am I just wasting resources and should be managing on my own? I just don’t know what to think any more.
I have realised that I need to make more time for me, take time out for things that I want to do rather than doing things that need to be done, or things that the kids want to do. I’m not sure what those things are, but I need to start thinking what they are and find the time to do them.
I also need to plan my business better, I need to make it work because I know it will make me happy, I need to succeed in something in my life.
But knowing all these things doesn’t seem to make my mind any clearer, I guess I just have to keep plodding on and hope that one day things will seem clearer.