I think I may have forgotten who I am, I feel ok at the moment, well I don’t feel down although I have had a difficult few days and had thoughts of sh, but generally I am doing ok.
BUT who am I? What do I like, what makes me happy? I feel like I have forgotten how to act, how to have normal conversations. I feel like I have been away for a long long time and everything has changed, and I don’t know how to fit in.
I’m hoping to go to a singing group tomorrow which my therapist reckons will help me find something to enjoy and therefore my thoughts of sh and having no direction will go, I have my doubts especially about the thoughts of sh.
I have my own business, selling cards, but at the moment that’s not giving me much feeling of usefulness, or belonging, or even enjoyment. I no longer seem to know what my path is, I know that some of it is that I am in a new chapter of my life, (no more babies in our family), but it doesn’t explain it all.
There was more to this post, but from writing it on my iPhone and trying to add tags on the desktop I seem to have lost the end of it. As I wrote this last night I can’t remember what I wrote, actually last night I couldn’t remember what I wrote, so there was no hope today. So I will leave it as it is, except to ask the question; how do I go about finding myself?