So yet again its been a fortnight since I last posted, and yet again I have not managed to look at other posts and comment. Apologies to all, the house has been in chaos and I was slowly sinking in piles of paper, washing and dust!
For me though this is about reflecting on the positives of my life and not on the negatives, or the issues I seem to be living with at the moment! So here are the things that I’ve managed to do over the last 2 weeks.
1. I managed to drag myself out of bed at the crack of dawn on a Sunday morning to help run a carbootless stall in aid of The Joanne Bingley Memorial Foundation. I had offered my help a few weeks earlier and thought nothing of it till nearer the date and the realisation of the early start dawned! However myself and DW (one of the Trustees) managed to get there at a suitable time and get set up. I have to admit to being rather nervous at first, I had never done something like this before, I had only sold new products for my business, a car boot sale is totally different. Once I got going though I really enjoyed it, me and DW had a good natter in-between sales and I think halfway through the morning I realised how good it felt to be away from the children and doing something for me. We were there for about 5 hours in total and we raised about £100, which was brilliant, and everything we sold had been donated. It felt so good to actually do something for the Foundation for the first time. It kept me on a high for a couple of days!
2. At my local Toddler Group I set up a stall with the last of my stock from my business (Children’s wooden and soft toys & gifts), I was very nervous about it, but I needed to try to shift some of the stock, so it seemed a good idea. TJ was very clingy, but a friend was very helpful and took over the care of her for the morning. This gave me the chance to sell some stock, and also to talk openly to some mums about my PND, I never went into much detail, but I felt quite liberated to admit that I had been ill and with what. Most were very supportive (I hope to build on it this week at toddlers) but a couple were a little unsure of what to say. I did well though, which helps towards Christmas, but also towards the end of my business which I really want to move on from.
3. On Saturday we went out with a couple for a meal and then back to theirs for a drink, we had a great time as usual, and it was great to be without the children. We also had the luxury of a lie in as the children were on a sleep over at Grandmas! I managed to sleep till after 10.00! So I think socialising is definitely helping me find my groove again.
4. On Monday I went to Meadowhall (shopping mall) and met up with a very good friend who I see very little of, it was lovely to see her, we had a good natter and also managed to get some Christmas shopping done. It does remind me when I see her though that we don’t keep in touch enough, I always promise myself that I will but it never happens. Luckily this time we will be seeing them at Christmas so it won’t be long before we meet up again. I think part of getting my groove is keeping in contact with friends old and new, as it really helps to keep you ‘you’ and not just being a mummy all the time.
So this week Kate has set us a few challenges, I’m not overly good at this part, but I will do my best!
1. My challenge to myself, I think that has to be to blog more than once a fortnight! I challenge myself to do at least 2 blogs in the coming week, I have lots to talk about I just need to make the time for ME.
2. Poetry, I always loved poems, but never seem to read or look at them anymore. When I read the challenge the first poem that came to mind is one that I used when I was doing my A-levels, I’m sure it was my Drama teacher that showed it to me. It’s not a lovey dovey poem, its harsh and to the point, but I think it’s a great poem. Its called
‘Back in the Playground Blues’ by Adrian Mitchell
I dreamed I was back in the playground, I was about four feet high
Yes dreamed I was back in the playground, standing about four feet high
Well the playground was three miles long and the playground was five miles wide
It was broken black tarmac with a high wire fence all around
Broken black dusty tarmac with a high wire fence running all around
And it had a special name to it, they called it The Killing Ground
Got a mother and a father, they’re one thousand years away
The rulers of The Killing Ground are coming out to play
Everybody thinking: ‘Who they going to play with today?’
Well you get it for being Jewish
And you get it for being black
Get it for being chicken
And you get it for fighting back
You get it for being big and fat
Get it for being small
Oh those who get it get it and get it
For any damn thing at all
Sometimes they take a beetle, tear off its six legs one by one
Beetle on its black back, rocking in the lunchtime sun
But a beetle can’t beg for more, a beetle’s not half the fun
I heard a deep voice talking, it had that iceberg sound
‘It prepares them for Life’ – but I have never found
Any place in my life worse than The Killing Ground.
It would be interesting to know what others think of that poem, I think its very powerful.
3. Dancing, I would love to say I go out dancing every weekend, but I think you would know I was not being truthful! So I will do some dancing with the children, most likely TJ as she is so cute when she starts dancing and giggling about it.
4. I’m not so good with these lists, so I will have a think and see whether I can manage to join in or not, but 3 out of is pretty good going me thinks!
So that is me, have you enjoyed the read? Has it inspired you to start trying to find your groove? Why not pop over to Kate on Thin Ice and see what it’s all about.