After an awful week last week I saw my CPN on Tuesday, I was feeling anxious and really down. We spoke about what might have triggered all this and the only thing I could come up with was hormonal, (although that is not a definite as I am not at all regular with my period and it has not yet appeared!) I showed her a diary I had started with short inserts about how I was feeling, stressed, happy, depressed etc. She thought it was a really good exercise but also commented that I didn’t seem to get any ‘me’ time. She asked if I ever went out with friends on an evening or did any sports etc. All of which I don’t, I have very few close friends and I always seem to make some excuse why I can’t do something.
Anyway we chatted about things, what I wanted to do about how I felt. Which I didn’t really know, I was and am fed up of feeling down and not feeling like I have anything to look forward to, just really not feeling anything. I did get upset but felt by the time she left that I had got rid of some of the anxieties and also felt kind of calmer.
I am having another good day, I feel more positive about things, and feel able to do a bit more. I think sometimes conversation is underrated, for me even a five-minute chat in the playground can lift my mood. I think I also realised by chatting to my CPN that I need to start helping myself a bit more, I’ve got to make the effort, I need to start eating better, not filling up on chocolate and then eating nothing else!I’ve also got to make the effort to see more people.
So my challenge to myself is to eat healthier and to go to a toddler group next week!